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Mr Nobody
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A couple of years ago, dire necessity required me to sell most of my collection. Some stuff went to a collectibles store, the rest went to a friend of mine, who also had his own shoppe. I had originally asked for his help in selling the rest, but he would only offer to buy it all from me himself. My situation being what it was at the time, I gave in to that. My life was in a huge upheaval then, and the only choices I had were either sell to him, or basically lose it all and get nothing. So I had to settle for that, and I moved on.

 

Here's my issue. Every time he made a huge profit off of selling one of my old pieces, he went out of his way to tell me about it, like he wanted me to be proud of him. At first, I thought he was just being matter-of-fact, but every time, it became more pronounced. I thought he was kidding and I just kept waiting for him to break face. He never did....as far as I could tell, he WAS gloating. I no longer feel comfortable going there, amd I haven't been back for about a year.

 

Just want some opinions on these interactions I've had with him. Am I being overly sensitive, or am I right in perceiving this as kind of a douche bag move?

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Would he gloat before? I would say no. If he did well back then, he would say something like "this was a good day". But when it came to the stuff I had sold him afterwards, it was always "Hey I made this much off of that Fin Fang Foom I got from you!", or "This guy gave me a nice coin for that Shogun Warrior jumbo Mazinga!" That alone isn't what bugged me as much as the smirk he was wearing when he said it. That's what actually stuck in my craw. Like I said before, I kept waiting for him to break face and say, "Hey, just messing with you", but that never happened. He always seem to be waiting for some kind of reaction from me, which I never gave him.

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You know the guy, I don't. But it sounds like he's trying to pay you a back-handed compliment. Letting you know he made a profit with your former stuff is his way of telling you your collection was worth something to someone besides you. As much as any collector hates having to part with a piece of his/her collection, hearing that it ended up on the clearance table on the sidewalk out front would only add insult to injury.

 

Might also keep in mind, the guy did do you a solid by helping you out when you needed it. You should be glad he's getting a return on his kindness.

 

Finally, it sounds like you're feeling the pangs of seller's remorse. It may even be influencing your interpretation of what the guys saying or doing. I get it. I know the feeling all to well. More than once my collection has helped make those proverbial ends meet. It may not take away the sting of loosing that ML Juggernaut, but at least it was for a good cause. Plus, I know someday I'll get another one. Just don't give in to bitterness.

 

Its just stuff man.

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I understand your predicament while it suxx he's rubbing it in, it can only bother you if you let it.....is he a douche?.....probably cause most "good" friends wouldn't treat you like that especially if they knew how much your "treasures" meant to you....but like Mako stated, he did help you when you needed it....so it's a catch 22....everyone has prolly experienced this sort of deal at one time or another......A buddy of mine was looking to start collecting again so I sold him some very cool items & since we're friends I gave him the prices w/no markup or exactly what I paid for them & I always scope deals so I got some great prices on most of the items I sold him.....ex. Masterpiece Skywarp from the Walmart release.....they were $17 on clearance & I bought 2.....he really liked it & was getting back into collecting so I gave him one for Xmas, now those figs are worth a lil bit more than $17 these days.....of course I hooked him up w/some POC & ROC & 25th Joes....Lifeline, SciFi, Law n' Order ect. ect......a few weeks back he told me he was going to sell all of his stuff....of course that was upsetting to me cause I gave him some damn good stuff that I could've sold for some good $ had I hung on to it all........however......it was his stuff, I had no ties to it anymore.....and another story.....I left my home-town a few years back & gave my toyz & comixs to some of my friends to hold onto for safe keeping.....well I went back & my stuff was gone....I had 6 long boxes of comics & a lot of TMNT & Toybiz old marvel figs & Joes galore, all I was able to recover was 1 long-box back.....it was a bummer but an eye-opener.....They're not losing any sleep over it & neither am I....your the bigger man for not getting into a physical or verbal altercation.....your best bet is to avoid your "friend".....Hope you can start to rebuild your collection & put this behind you.....

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I can understand how it may come across as bragging, but like Mako said, we don't know him so only you would know what his intention is he could be letting you know that the collection didn't go to waste. My advice is next time it happens, say something like "gee rub it in why don't you?" in a sarcastic jokingly tone and see how he responds. If it persists and it bothers you so much, talk to him about it and clear the air, in a polite calm manner let him know how his behavior is really making you feel; if your friendship is really that strong you should be able to settle the matter and keep being friends.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I can understand how it may come across as bragging, but like Mako said, we don't know him so only you would know what his intention is he could be letting you know that the collection didn't go to waste. My advice is next time it happens, say something like "gee rub it in why don't you?" in a sarcastic jokingly tone and see how he responds. If it persists and it bothers you so much, talk to him about it and clear the air, in a polite calm manner let him know how his behavior is really making you feel; if your friendship is really that strong you should be able to settle the matter and keep being friends.

yeah, some people just have no class or knowlage of sensativity. he could be a douche or it could be his attempt at a compliment. to me, i think he's just clueless on how you actually felt about having to give up your collection. he clearly only sees your collection in dollars and cents.

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Thanks for all the responses, everyone. I realized he actually was being a prick about it. In the last couple of weeks, we were both over at a friends house, and I talked with him again and the conversation steered back to that time. He actually had the gall to say it was a good thing for him that I was going through so much then since I was in a bad relationship and including that my father had gotten sick then or he wouldn't be able to have pulled that over on me! I couldn't believe how blatantly blunt he was being! I cursed him out and told him what I thought of him and that we were no longer friends, not that we probably even were in the first place since this is his attitude towards things. Admittedly it made things uncomfortable for everyone else unfortunately, but he said it right in front of them , so now they all know how he really is.

 

It's great when someone is this honest about how they are. I can't take the last few years back and undo it all, but at least I've got a nice taste of truth for once. A phrase that a friend of mine from the Navy once told me turns out to be very true: the truth is like a tiger; it doesn't have to be defended. Set it free and it will defend itself!

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A phrase that a friend of mine from the Navy once told me turns out to be very true: the truth is like a tiger; it doesn't have to be defended. Set it free and it will defend itself!

ha, that's awesome! i'm going to addopt that catchphrase :D

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