Family memeber's annying you about your collecting

[Mydyingtoys]

My mother is starting to get on my nerves on buying action figures.She tells me that the people in the collecting store are telling me to buy this and that ,that the people want to make money.Which not true ,I usually buy what I want and I do not talk to everyone at the store I go to.

 

She says ,she does not mind me buying games.but she calls my figure junk and she says I do not do anything with them .Well moron,I collecting is doing something with them.

 

 

Thoughts,advice

[ARROW]

You want advice?

 

Move out.

 

Then you can be your own man and won't have to answer to anyone.

[Mydyingtoys]

You want advice?

 

Move out.

 

Then you can be your own man and won't have to answer to anyone.

 

@grumpy@ you do not know my family ,they love to stoop and they want to see you everyday .God I hate being Persian.

[ARROW]

You want advice?

 

Move out.

 

Then you can be your own man and won't have to answer to anyone.

 

@grumpy@ you do not know my family ,they love to stoop and they want to see you everyday .God I hate being Persian.

 

If you want to use "slavery" to your culture or family as an excuse then that's up to you, but if you submit to it, you are permitting it.

Remember that respect in ANYTHING is earned, not demanded or bought.

If you want things to change.......and I mean REALLY want things to change, then you'll probably have to consider making the changes yourself.

Maybe establish some rules for people around you. Make the rules clear to them.........things you will tolerate and things you absolutely will not.

Most people tend to be reasonable about such things, but for those that don't, look at it as a opportunity to educate them. If they don't respect your rules, make it painful for them. I'm not saying hurt them physically or anything like that, but gently push those "buttons" that all people have that tend to bother them and show them you don't like their behaviours.

There's ways of doing this that they will not even be consciously aware of.

 

Does your culture and family have some set roles and behaviour patterns that they play out? They do and think things because......well, hey everyone around them has always thought and done things those ways?

Sounds like they do, but they likely also have things that they respond to and will overlook things that bother them if they see certain things from you.

Nothing gets people to conform to what YOU want faster than them thinking the idea comes from themselves.

 

Just be clear about what you want, learn what THEY want and try to find the way to keep both happening.

Chances are what they really want doesn't have anything to do with your hobbies.

[WinterSoldier]

She says ,she does not mind me buying games.but she calls my figure junk and she says I do not do anything with them .Well moron,I collecting is doing something with them.

 

 

Thoughts,advice

You could just do what I used to do: tell her she's got a point--you've been "wasting" your money on "junk" for years when you could be putting it toward something worthwhile like cheap whores and expensive booze.

[*Deathblade]

My mother is starting to get on my nerves on buying action figures.She tells me that the people in the collecting store are telling me to buy this and that ,that the people want to make money.Which not true ,I usually buy what I want and I do not talk to everyone at the store I go to.

 

She says ,she does not mind me buying games.but she calls my figure junk and she says I do not do anything with them .Well moron,I collecting is doing something with them.

 

 

Thoughts,advice

 

how old are you? Also, calling your mom a moron, even in frustration... @hmmm@

[Mydyingtoys]

^

I am going to turn 26 in April.

[shokker]

i went threw the same thing man. move out and you will be more then happy. parents dont understand. its the way it is. once they have a certain way of life or age, they deny everything that is new to them. see my mom smokes and i always found something to piss her off once she wanted me to stop because i had enough and so on and so on. you know the story. so when she claims that i should stop i made a nice little calculation about how much she spends on smoking a month and how much i spend on figures a month. guess who won? parents dont meen no harm to you. it is true that toycollecting is expensive and you should take care of your account and save some money because that was a trap i fall in once. i buy and i buy and then i fall in debt. it happens fast without even noticing. i am all over this now but once you are on a roll, it is hard to stop. dont go into a fight with family because you never know when you need them. take a deep breath and let them talk. if you wanna stay at your mom's then you have to suck it up. thats the way it is. the day you move, you will be at peace. thats my experience. you seem to be old enough to take care of yourself. parents need their privat room to. it took me a while before i understood this myself. i even blame myself that i didn't move out earlier. if you see each other every day and you fight about stuff that isn't even worth fighting for, then a change has to happen. if you are not ready for a change then as i said, you have to suck it up and let it pass by you.

[kerowack]

Of course somebody has already said "at least you aren't spending money on whores and booze", because that's the absolute most common defense when somebody accuses you of wasting money. Bartenders and whores probably hear "I could be wasting money on toys right now..."

 

Anyway, if it gets to you, ask yourself why? Do you agree? Do you secretly hate the addicting nature of collecting? If so, sell them and you won't have to hear anything anymore. If not? LOCK YOUR DOOR.

 

If my wife ever said one word about my collecting (and I have a basement dedicated to it), I'd listen to it, say "your opinion is valued" and then ignore her. You gotta have a thicker skin!

[cjflan32]

Move out? Yeah, easier said than done brother.

 

My chain-smoking mother ragged on my collecting habits once. I said, "Yeah, my hobby may contribute to a lot of plastic sitting on a shelf but at least it doesn't cause cancer."

 

Make people live up to their own rules and standards. You'll have a much easier time dealing with them.

[Mydyingtoys]

Thanks for all the replies,I think it is time to get out of the house ,maybe it is time for me to cook and clean and do laundry on my own.

 

i hope that helps if not then i would defiantly make fun of her doll collection.

[cjflan32]

Thanks for all the replies,I think it is time to get out of the house ,maybe it is time for me to cook and clean and do laundry on my own.

 

Uhh, yeah...

 

 

i hope that helps if not then i would defiantly make fun of her doll collection.

 

For real? Dude that's some flat out hypocrisy on your mom's part right there.

[Guest]

Almost everyone that has a hobby of collecting items will end up getting crap from family or someone they're in a relationship with.

 

Just don't let it get to you. If collecting makes you happy, who cares what other people have to say? It's none of their business. And if that person actually cared, they wouldn't constantly pester you about it if they knew that bothered you. Try talking it out. You'd be amazed at how much you can accomplish by doing so.

[shokker]

now wait a minute, your mom has a doll collection??? you got to move. she needs space for new dolls and you need space for more figures. perfect solution for everyone. just kidding.