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The Top 10 Reasons The GI Joe Movie Will Suck


DarthJoe

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Is there even a synopsis of the story for the movie? I have heard nothing about it, only pictures.

 

 

This is from www.gijoemovie.com (the 'official website')

 

SYNOPSIS

Paramount Pictures and Hasbro, whose previous collaboration was the worldwide blockbuster "TRANSFORMERS," join forces with Spyglass Entertainment for another extraordinary action-adventure "G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra." From the Egyptian desert to deep below the polar ice caps, the elite G.I. JOE team uses the latest in next-generation spy and military equipment to fight the corrupt arms dealer Destro and the growing threat of the mysterious Cobra organization to prevent them from plunging the world into chaos. "G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra." is directed by Stephen Sommers ("The Mummy," "The Mummy Returns").

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I just wonder if you all realize he might be trying to be a little funny and dramatic here?

 

Ya, I was wondering the same thing. The guy was trying to be over the top on purpose, yet still brought up some good points. SENSE OF HUMOR guys...sense of humor.

 

 

Problem is that it's not funny. It's generic, irate internet fanboy "funny", which means it's a good example of what passes for funny among geeks these days when trying to be funny, but that doesn't mean it's actually humorous. What it is is b!tchy, whiney, smug, sanctimonius, poorly written and stupid. There's nothing quite like a jealous, dissatisfied, underachieving, unoriginal fanboy with too much time on his hands taking shots at folks who actually try to do something with their lives. It's rapidly becoming apparent that the worst things about the ol' world wide web are blogs and message forums.

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I just wonder if you all realize he might be trying to be a little funny and dramatic here?

 

Ya, I was wondering the same thing. The guy was trying to be over the top on purpose, yet still brought up some good points. SENSE OF HUMOR guys...sense of humor.

 

 

Problem is that it's not funny. It's generic, irate internet fanboy "funny", which means it's a good example of what passes for funny among geeks these days when trying to be funny, but that doesn't mean it's actually humorous. What it is is b!tchy, whiney, smug, sanctimonius, poorly written and stupid. There's nothing quite like a jealous, dissatisfied, underachieving, unoriginal fanboy with too much time on his hands taking shots at folks who actually try to do something with their lives. It's rapidly becoming apparent that the worst things about the ol' world wide web are blogs and message forums.

if you really hate that style of writing so much why does your post resemble it so much? What's under his craw, so to speak, is the movie, yours is him disliking so passionately. For every fan boy like him there is one like you who really doesn't want to hear anything negative! it's the net, it's a hobby it's going to happen. Your post looks like a personal attack on the man, how can you be better? do you not think any of his points are valid?

 

and if your not using a little drama stating that the worst thing in the world is blogs and forums then maybe you need to watch the news. I'm willing to put though that you, like it or not, are using the same passion and "slight" exaggeration as the blogger in question.

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I just wonder if you all realize he might be trying to be a little funny and dramatic here?

 

Ya, I was wondering the same thing. The guy was trying to be over the top on purpose, yet still brought up some good points. SENSE OF HUMOR guys...sense of humor.

 

 

Problem is that it's not funny. It's generic, irate internet fanboy "funny", which means it's a good example of what passes for funny among geeks these days when trying to be funny, but that doesn't mean it's actually humorous. What it is is b!tchy, whiney, smug, sanctimonius, poorly written and stupid. There's nothing quite like a jealous, dissatisfied, underachieving, unoriginal fanboy with too much time on his hands taking shots at folks who actually try to do something with their lives. It's rapidly becoming apparent that the worst things about the ol' world wide web are blogs and message forums.

 

Kind of like there's nothing like the humorless, over-serious, defensive, name-calling fanboy taking shots at someone who is merely having some fun with a blog post?

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Here's some questions that some of the complaining fans can ask themselves:

 

Did the leprechauns and silly stuff in the GIJOE cartoon ruin GIJOE for you?

 

Did COBRA Commander's chronic ineptitude ruin GIJOE for you?

 

Did the inability of GIJOE and COBRA forces to actually hit anything they ever aimed at ruin GIJOE for you?

 

Did truly silly characters like Raptor, Captain Gridiron or the Fridge ruin GIJOE for you?

 

Did the silly PSA's with the Joe team members offering "sage" advice --and later turned into quite twisted laughable versions of the PSAs ruin GIJOE for you?

 

Did SGT. Savage or GIJOE Extreme, Or Sigma Six ruin GIJOE for you?

 

Did the Valor vs Venom movie (which was pretty dumb in many respects) ruin GIJOE for you?

 

All of these things have happened, all of them are undeniably, indelibly GIJOE.....and yet I cannot recall hearing anyone decry anything in the above list as ruining GIJOE forever.

Of course, if someone were to bemoan any of these, wouldn't it seem like they've pinned all their likes/dislikes onto things that.....really......weren't of any lasting consequence?

Kind of like this movie is probably going to end up being?

 

I mean, when you get right down to it, GIJOE is steeped in stupid stuff. its full of really dumb moments that people overlook, and true to form, the complainers are overlooking that this movie might well have some very cool moments to it.

I don't mind Somners work as a director. I like the Mummy movies, and Van Helsing.....they work for me as popcorn films. GIJOE isn't high-concept, it isn't deep,engaging drama........its fluff........military fantasy, a popcorn movie if there ever was one.

If fans think they should be getting "Blackhawk Down" or something like that, they need to take a good loook at GIJOE again........because its never been that before. Its a bad guy in a hood and his army running around hatching schemes and trying to conquer the world, and a bunch of good guys rushing into the lair and shooting the place up.

Beyond that, what else really matters?

 

 

I agree with you in that a lot of the old joe was futuristic or down right silly. no those elements didn't kill joe for me, but that doesn't me that's what i like about Joe. G.I.Joe has has so many venues it's amazing. Comics, toons, even just the filecards have such different flavors. It's not like a proptery like star wars where chars are and circumstances are more concrete. That right there causes plenty of division between. Sports fans may leave a team but strongly disagree with a coach's call, or even the new coach. (still not thrilled with UK's new basketball coach, then again i wasn't with the last one we had either...) We love the brand and we are going to point out the things we don't like.

 

STUFF MUST CHANGE! i agree with you 100% it's going to happen, but why not try to steer in the direction we enjoy most.

 

I agree that this or any movie can't rape our childhood but it can crush some dreams that child long ago had and are still with us. Or maybe dreams the adult had that we want to attribute to our inner child.

 

This is a live-action movie going for what a pg 13 audience it really bothers me that leans more towards the kiddy side than the more mature aspect of Joe. A lot of us don't want black hawk down, but we don't sigma six the movie either. Joe has primarly been a solider up till now, even if a futuristic one at times, sigma six and this movie take them much farther than they have been before. A lot of us just don't like it.

 

In the ends it's Hasbro's right to do what they want. (I still wish someone could explain the Roadblock vs. Heavy Duty issue to me), and our place to take it or leave it.

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I just wonder if you all realize he might be trying to be a little funny and dramatic here?

 

Ya, I was wondering the same thing. The guy was trying to be over the top on purpose, yet still brought up some good points. SENSE OF HUMOR guys...sense of humor.

 

 

Problem is that it's not funny. It's generic, irate internet fanboy "funny", which means it's a good example of what passes for funny among geeks these days when trying to be funny, but that doesn't mean it's actually humorous. What it is is b!tchy, whiney, smug, sanctimonius, poorly written and stupid. There's nothing quite like a jealous, dissatisfied, underachieving, unoriginal fanboy with too much time on his hands taking shots at folks who actually try to do something with their lives. It's rapidly becoming apparent that the worst things about the ol' world wide web are blogs and message forums.

 

Kind of like there's nothing like the humorless, over-serious, defensive, name-calling fanboy taking shots at someone who is merely having some fun with a blog post?

 

haha! darthjoe old buddy, i missed you while i was on my net sabbatical. saying essential the same thing @ about the same time.

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Thought this was a pretty entertaining read, and wanted to share it:

 

http://sixdemonbag.wordpress.com/2008/08/1...ovie-will-suck/

 

There's some colorful language, so if you're sensitive to that type of thing, you may want to skip it.

 

My favorite quote:

 

(Talking about Stephen Sommers directing the film) "Couldn't they have found someone with a background in making military action films? S**t, was Michael Bay not available? That guy's notorious for fetishizing soldiers, aircraft, and other military equipment in his flicks. Oh wait, that's right, he was busy raping the childhoods of thousands of Transformers fans. My bad."

 

@loll@

 

Darth, Thank You for putting this link up. It is a great read, and I totally agree with absolutely everything he said. I liked it so much I had to add a reply. My main gripes about the new movie, are the look, and the fact that Marlon Wayans is in it. I DON"T CARE what he was in that deserves an oscar (yeah right about the oscar)!! I can take updates to costumes. I would prefer the signature costumes mind you. I just hope they don't make a ##$%$#ed decision and turn Zartan into a blue alien thing like they did with Mystique in X-men.

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haha! darthjoe old buddy, i missed you while i was on my net sabbatical. saying essential the same thing @ about the same time.

 

Indeed. :)

 

I always like reading your input...the stuff I can understand anyways. ;) @smilepunch@

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I just hope they don't make a ##$%$#ed decision and turn Zartan into a blue alien thing like they did with Mystique in X-men.

 

Oh, man...don't give them any ideas. @lol@

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After seeing so many Blockbuster original hits like "Speed racer" and " War Zone".. and hearing about such Blockbuster well written films such as "twilight" and "Tropic Thunder".

 

 

I think it's safe to say this movie WILL be a giant piece of dung. Hollywood has no originality left in these union loving directors and producers. Its obvious this is just another med budget toy selling movie.

I give Beatti writing credit, But Sommers does not know when to keep the Comedy aspects back. And he likes more then enough fantasy to be added in.

 

Might be a Good popcorn flick, but it will be shadowed by the better movies.

Heck they aren't even talking about it on "the top 10 movies for 09' "

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Well, I have to say I read the whole thing, and it IS kinda rantish here and there, but honestly, if I go down the line, I agree with every point that he states 1-10 at least. The whole raping childhood rants are over the top for me, but my biggest gripe with the Movie is the whole changing G.I.Joe from something that was AMERICAN, into something completly different. that to me is a real sell out. If it dont say "A Real American Hero" I would rather it not be made. But also that is MY perspective of G.I.Joe, and there are different generations of G.I.Joe as we all know. the 80's Joe is the most prominent these days.

That said, Im Taking some advice from an internet buddy, and Im ROOTING for the Movie. There is only two things I like about it so far and its Ray Parks and Sienna Miller, other than that you can keep it. But someone Smarter and Wiser than me told me that if this movie TANKS like some others it WILL be the DETH OF THE LINE, and Joe will return to seclusion for awhile. I want more Joes so I want the movie to succeed. I want Joe to be around for MY son, whether he likes new movie stuff, OR plays joe with his dads old stuff.

THAT was what I had to realize about the movie. and I think EVERYONE who likes G.I.JOE should take some of that same wisdom that was given to me (thanks GS) and ROOT FOR THE MOVIE.

 

You dont Have to see it.....(I know you will though)...

You DONT have to LIKE it!!( Sienna WILL be wearing a tight outfit!!)

 

BUT you SHOULD at least Support the movie's success. Wether it means every Joe fan seeing it TWICE (may be extreme) or at least giving it a shot. THIS MOVIE...WILL DICTATE how the future of our beloved toys go. Im NOT happy with how its going at all, but im DONE with flaming it, and I want it to succeed...

 

YO JOE!!!

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I just wonder if you all realize he might be trying to be a little funny and dramatic here?

 

Ya, I was wondering the same thing. The guy was trying to be over the top on purpose, yet still brought up some good points. SENSE OF HUMOR guys...sense of humor.

 

 

Problem is that it's not funny. It's generic, irate internet fanboy "funny", which means it's a good example of what passes for funny among geeks these days when trying to be funny, but that doesn't mean it's actually humorous. What it is is b!tchy, whiney, smug, sanctimonius, poorly written and stupid. There's nothing quite like a jealous, dissatisfied, underachieving, unoriginal fanboy with too much time on his hands taking shots at folks who actually try to do something with their lives. It's rapidly becoming apparent that the worst things about the ol' world wide web are blogs and message forums.

if you really hate that style of writing so much why does your post resemble it so much? What's under his craw, so to speak, is the movie, yours is him disliking so passionately. For every fan boy like him there is one like you who really doesn't want to hear anything negative! it's the net, it's a hobby it's going to happen. Your post looks like a personal attack on the man, how can you be better? do you not think any of his points are valid?

 

and if your not using a little drama stating that the worst thing in the world is blogs and forums then maybe you need to watch the news. I'm willing to put though that you, like it or not, are using the same passion and "slight" exaggeration as the blogger in question.

 

First, read before posting. I said "...worst things about the ol' world wide web. My point is exactly that there are more important things to get pissed about.

 

Second, I chose to write in the aforementioned "style" as a subtle jab. Interweb attacking is an awfully easy thing to do; especially when you follow the whiney fanboy formula. I suppose I should've called attention to the sarcasm, but I took it for granted that most would get that bit of subtlety. Note however that I mostly refrained from using gratuitous profanity, but did utilize proper punctuation.

 

Third, I'm not attacking this dude alone, I'm calling out the smug, self-satisfied, whiney fanboy in general who think dropping the F-bomb every other sentence and utilizing cliched pop-phrases while tearing others efforts down is a form of humor. This guy is calling something crap before he's actually seen it. Why should he be applauded for that? Or for such a half-arsed, generic effort? Seriously. Why should any armchair complainer be applauded for doing nothing more than doing nothing. Guess I touched a nerve there...

 

Fourth, speaking of seriousness, I can take or leave toys-- already have, in fact-- so this isn't serious to me. The only reason I'm here is because I dig some of the intelligent chatter around here and still have a soft spot for the nostalgia of my youth. But that doesn't mean I don't mind calling BS when I see it. I'm tired of psuedo-intellictual dorks bitching about children's toys and anything that has to do with them. I don't care if he likes the movie or not, but the fact remains he hasn't even seen it yet. So from where exactly does his dissastisfaction stem? Or yours. Why do you think he's so wonderful? Maybe because you're a generic fanboy too?

 

Kind of like there's nothing like the humorless, over-serious, defensive, name-calling fanboy taking shots at someone who is merely having some fun with a blog post?

 

And yet another one. My goodness you guys are easy to jerk around. Talk about "serious". ;)

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Well, I have to say I read the whole thing, and it IS kinda rantish here and there, but honestly, if I go down the line, I agree with every point that he states 1-10 at least. The whole raping childhood rants are over the top for me, but my biggest gripe with the Movie is the whole changing G.I.Joe from something that was AMERICAN, into something completly different. that to me is a real sell out. If it dont say "A Real American Hero" I would rather it not be made. But also that is MY perspective of G.I.Joe, and there are different generations of G.I.Joe as we all know. the 80's Joe is the most prominent these days.

That said, Im Taking some advice from an internet buddy, and Im ROOTING for the Movie. There is only two things I like about it so far and its Ray Parks and Sienna Miller, other than that you can keep it. But someone Smarter and Wiser than me told me that if this movie TANKS like some others it WILL be the DETH OF THE LINE, and Joe will return to seclusion for awhile. I want more Joes so I want the movie to succeed. I want Joe to be around for MY son, whether he likes new movie stuff, OR plays joe with his dads old stuff.

THAT was what I had to realize about the movie. and I think EVERYONE who likes G.I.JOE should take some of that same wisdom that was given to me (thanks GS) and ROOT FOR THE MOVIE.

 

You dont Have to see it.....(I know you will though)...

You DONT have to LIKE it!!( Sienna WILL be wearing a tight outfit!!)

 

BUT you SHOULD at least Support the movie's success. Wether it means every Joe fan seeing it TWICE (may be extreme) or at least giving it a shot. THIS MOVIE...WILL DICTATE how the future of our beloved toys go. Im NOT happy with how its going at all, but im DONE with flaming it, and I want it to succeed...

 

YO JOE!!!

 

Ray park to me is the only pro to this movie as of now. As for the movie I hope it tanks, and leaves a sour taste. From the figures looking stupid to the cast being non shilant and noting it as comedy sci fi "t and a" movie, that adds another nail in its coffin. The only thing to note from this is the fact that the recent 25th success shows people are interested in the line, and it is not a dead property. Now if Hasbro can only see the difference from a good toy line being profitable without any cartoons or anything tieing into it, to a movie being mistreated by Hollywood bringing it down, then they might take better care of the property, and know fans aren't sheep.

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That said, Im Taking some advice from an internet buddy, and Im ROOTING for the Movie. There is only two things I like about it so far and its Ray Parks and Sienna Miller, other than that you can keep it. But someone Smarter and Wiser than me told me that if this movie TANKS like some others it WILL be the DETH OF THE LINE, and Joe will return to seclusion for awhile. I want more Joes so I want the movie to succeed. I want Joe to be around for MY son, whether he likes new movie stuff, OR plays joe with his dads old stuff.

THAT was what I had to realize about the movie. and I think EVERYONE who likes G.I.JOE should take some of that same wisdom that was given to me (thanks GS) and ROOT FOR THE MOVIE.

 

This I can agree with.

 

Even if I do think it sucks, I hope it still does well in the box office. Actually, I hope I like it. It just doesn't look very appealing to me with what we've seen so far.

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The writer of that top ten list brought up a lot of points that I tend to agree with. However, a vast majority of them are COSMETIC changes that are going to be made to the movie (Heavy Duty, not Roadblock; black Rip Cord; no-mask Destro), all cosmetic. A movie like this can overcome stylistic change with a good script that stays true to the core material. The core material.

 

BUUUUUUUUTTTTT.....

 

It appears that this movie is not even going to do THAT. And this is where the writer of that top ten list missed the main reason that the movie will suck:

 

GI Joe is a Real AMERICAN Hero. GI Joe is the codename for AMERICA'S daring, highly-trained, special mission force.

 

This movie is going to have a hodge-podge of guys from around the globe to get together and take on Cobra. THey're not a Real AMERICAN Hero, because that theme won't sell movies overseas. THAT is going to be the one fatal flaw of this movie. Not black costumes.

 

Some people whined about Bay "raping their childhood" (someone still has to explain to me how that's done by puting flames on a truck). But in the end the core material of the Transformers reamined intact. A waring race of robots from another planet brings their war to Earth and disguises themselves among us by changing into vehicles. There. They made a movie about that. I'm sorry if you miss the VW Bug, but they stayed true to the basic theme.

 

I find myself wondering just how often in the movie we will see an American flag being waved or America being refered to in any kind of patriotic sence. My guess is, not many. If I'm wrong, I'll be happy.

 

If they were making a movie about a Real AMERICAN Hero, I could possibly overlook anything else from that top ten list. Unfortunately, that probably ain't gonna happen. If you can't make the movie without staying true to the core of what the frinchise is about, then by all means, do not make the movie.

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While I agree with most of the points of the blog (I don't really care that Stalker aint in it)... I don't think it will effect GiJoe to me at all.

 

Ok, we will be getting TERRIBLE movie toys for a while now... I guess that does impact GiJoe for me.

 

But it won't change "GiJoe" to me. Won't ruin my memories of GiJoe, won't ruin my love of my toys, won't ruin anything like that.

 

 

They are only ruining this movie, which I have wanted ever since I was 4 or 5 years old. And that sucks big time. There wouldn't even be this movie if it weren't for guys like me.

 

 

There is absolutely no reason why they couldn't have given us something closer to what GiJoe is. The most successful comic movies resemble their source material very closely, the crappy ones don't. I think that is for good reason.

 

 

 

 

Anyhow, on a side note... what the hell is with all the people bashing the bashers? I am sorry, not everybody likes to stand still and eat crap while we should be eating steak. You guys musta gotten beat up alot in your lives and have just adapted this "take it" mentality. It's sad.

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While I agree with most of the points of the blog (I don't really care that Stalker aint in it)... I don't think it will effect GiJoe to me at all.

 

Ok, we will be getting TERRIBLE movie toys for a while now... I guess that does impact GiJoe for me.

 

But it won't change "GiJoe" to me. Won't ruin my memories of GiJoe, won't ruin my love of my toys, won't ruin anything like that.

 

 

They are only ruining this movie, which I have wanted ever since I was 4 or 5 years old. And that sucks big time. There wouldn't even be this movie if it weren't for guys like me.

 

 

There is absolutely no reason why they couldn't have given us something closer to what GiJoe is. The most successful comic movies resemble their source material very closely, the crappy ones don't. I think that is for good reason.

 

 

 

 

Anyhow, on a side note... what the hell is with all the people bashing the bashers? I am sorry, not everybody likes to stand still and eat crap while we should be eating steak. You guys musta gotten beat up alot in your lives and have just adapted this "take it" mentality. It's sad.

 

Thank You!! If I am going to be classed as a whiner because I prefer the source material to the changed material, whatever. I am sorry but I will not bow and say good job to something I think is crap. I hated the transformers movie. Everything about it. Bad acting, bad story, bad looking robot alien bugs that should have been in starship troopers 4. The fact that they transform to blend in to our world, but have a war on a fricking freeway. Well hid. For that matter, why transform now? Ok and the allspark, a life giving rubiks cube that makes transformers, they can't be made any other way, so if that goes, cyanara robotkind? Do the autobots and decepticons need to share it to make new robots? LAME. Where was the character build up? Why were we focusing on Shia labouf and his antics? Some of the fight scenes, you couldn't even tell what the heck was happening no matter how many times you rewound it. The flames, and the fact that Bumblebee was not a bug, are minor. I can take changes, but come on. Ok i'll shut up now so I can see the pretty explosions.

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Anyhow, on a side note... what the hell is with all the people bashing the bashers? I am sorry, not everybody likes to stand still and eat crap while we should be eating steak. You guys musta gotten beat up alot in your lives and have just adapted this "take it" mentality. It's sad.

 

No-one is saying "stand still and eat crap". You want to think that because you seem to not be able to think otherwise. What have you done besides complaining about it?

The complaining DOES NOTHING.

 

Its not constructive, the complainers never offer alternatives ( very few of them ever bother to delve into WHY the stuff comes out the way it does anyway), and they just close off reception of any other idea but those that feed their consumption.

Much like a spoiled child that throws a tantrum because they are not getting their pablum.

Well, most of us outgrow pablum, but it seems that tantrums can be a bit hard for some to shed.

 

The internet makes it EASY to complain. You just type in your rant and hit " enter" or "send".....so its easy to vent something off the cuff.

As we see so often......."off the cuff" means more shooting off of the mouth.....more static, if you will, and its does next to nothing.

Its not enough to simply speak with your wallet and not buy the stuff ( which is far, far more effective than ANY posted rant ever has been), instead people feel the need to bellow from the rooftops about their dislikes as well.

If the movie sucks.......it sucks. If it works well, great.......it'll be fun to watch. Complaining, or boosting the film will change neither of those things, because those things are outside of our control.

No-one is saying people HAVE TO like the movie, but the bashers end up thinking that.

 

So, yea, count me as bashing the bashers. I think they are wasting bandwidth and, frankly....they deserve it.

Given the vitriol of some posters on the forums, one can only wonder if its too much asking folks to keep an open mind.

Sure seems that way, I think.

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So, yea, count me as bashing the bashers. I think they are wasting bandwidth and, frankly....they deserve it.

 

I don't see how bashing the bashers is any less of a waste of bandwidth than the bashers bashing the movie. ;)

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I hated the designs for the TFs from the movie, and was pretty vocal about it. Got more than a few verbal beatdowns for it too.

Then I saw the movie, and to this day it hasn't ruined Transformers for me. I like that movie less every time I see it, but it makes me appreciate my memories from the 80s even more. I'll be seeing the sequel this summer. Hell, it might even be fun, now that the origin story is out of the way.

 

I don't like where they're going with the GI Joe flick, but that's just based on what I've seen, which is less than twenty still images. For every good thing, there's a bad thing, just like every other movie. I might have a great time at this one too. I think this is also a franchise that needs a sequel to truly be uncorked.

 

And I'll probably buy toys from both movies this summer.

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I can see the point of the whining in some aspects. The one on the list that bugs me the most is Ripcord, personally speaking. There weren't enough black characters in G.I. Joe? But as for the character, maybe he's integral to the plot. I doubt they just picked random characters out of a hat. And the only complaint about him being black is that while Hasbro has the name available now, we have little chance of seeing a 25th version because it might "interfere" with the movie version or some crap like that. As for Wayan's portrayal....wait and see the movie. He might be good.

 

I think it is too early to say ANYTHING about Destro's mask. It never made a lot of sense the guy would wear it ALL the time anyway. I've got a fanfic where he only wears it when necessary, like in battle or when dealing with a client.

 

Yes origin stories ARE necessary if your trying to introduce the line to new people. It depends on how its done. Take the Hulk (2003). One of the WORST origin stories ever (They don't even call him the Hulk. They call him "Angry Man" WTF?). The Hulk doesn't even show up until like an hour and half into the movie. Compare it to the 2008 version. The origin was done almost entirely within the intro, during the credits.

 

Now, I think it is obvious they can't do "The Rise of Cobra" THAT quickly, but doing it quick is possible, I believe.

 

As for the costumes, that does both me too. I see NO reason the Joes can't wear normal military uniforms if they want a "team look". I can understand why the didn't go with "classic" looks for the characters. I'm actually thinking that the black outfits are for just part of the movie, the rest will have them look normal.

 

He makes some discussing points (a few) in his rant, but most of it is just blather. The Transformers movie WASN'T G1, nor should it have been. Armada and Cyberton were not "G1" and they were pretty popular. As was Beast Wars. The problem with Transformers was that none of the Transformers had any real characterization. They were just "big robots". I can see that happening here, possibly, but I don't think so. I think the actors can pull of their rolls.

 

Well

 

Maybe. The thing that pisses me off the most about this movie is that interview with the jackass who plays Cobra Commander. If your not going to put 100% into a project, OF COURSE its going to suck.

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So, yea, count me as bashing the bashers. I think they are wasting bandwidth and, frankly....they deserve it.

 

I don't see how bashing the bashers is any less of a waste of bandwidth than the bashers bashing the movie. ;)

 

 

Okay, seriously. We're not allowed to use that word anymore.

 

Tom

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So, yea, count me as bashing the bashers. I think they are wasting bandwidth and, frankly....they deserve it.

 

I don't see how bashing the bashers is any less of a waste of bandwidth than the bashers bashing the movie. ;)

 

 

Okay, seriously. We're not allowed to use that word anymore.

 

Tom

 

Don't tell me you're going to start bashing the bashers, and the bashers of the bashers, for the use of the word bash. ;)

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Here's some questions that some of the complaining fans can ask themselves:

 

Did the leprechauns and silly stuff in the GIJOE cartoon ruin GIJOE for you?

 

Did COBRA Commander's chronic ineptitude ruin GIJOE for you?

 

Did the inability of GIJOE and COBRA forces to actually hit anything they ever aimed at ruin GIJOE for you?

 

Did truly silly characters like Raptor, Captain Gridiron or the Fridge ruin GIJOE for you?

 

Did the silly PSA's with the Joe team members offering "sage" advice --and later turned into quite twisted laughable versions of the PSAs ruin GIJOE for you?

 

Did SGT. Savage or GIJOE Extreme, Or Sigma Six ruin GIJOE for you?

 

Did the Valor vs Venom movie (which was pretty dumb in many respects) ruin GIJOE for you?

 

All of these things have happened, all of them are undeniably, indelibly GIJOE.....and yet I cannot recall hearing anyone decry anything in the above list as ruining GIJOE forever.

Of course, if someone were to bemoan any of these, wouldn't it seem like they've pinned all their likes/dislikes onto things that.....really......weren't of any lasting consequence?

Kind of like this movie is probably going to end up being?

 

I mean, when you get right down to it, GIJOE is steeped in stupid stuff. its full of really dumb moments that people overlook, and true to form, the complainers are overlooking that this movie might well have some very cool moments to it.

I don't mind Somners work as a director. I like the Mummy movies, and Van Helsing.....they work for me as popcorn films. GIJOE isn't high-concept, it isn't deep,engaging drama........its fluff........military fantasy, a popcorn movie if there ever was one.

If fans think they should be getting "Blackhawk Down" or something like that, they need to take a good loook at GIJOE again........because its never been that before. Its a bad guy in a hood and his army running around hatching schemes and trying to conquer the world, and a bunch of good guys rushing into the lair and shooting the place up.

Beyond that, what else really matters?

 

QFT

 

I'm not sure where folks got this idea that G.I. Joe was a Tom Clancy novel or an ultra-realistic and grim n' gritty story, but some of the complaints I've seen make me seriously wonder what G.I. Joe these people are talking about, because it sure as heck ain't the 80's era stuff. G.I. Joe has been loaded with Sci-Fi, Fantasy, and outright silly elements from the beginning of the RAH era.

 

Speaking of RAH: G.I. Joe is what Hasbro says it is, not what we think it is. It's been "A Real American Hero", it's been "Sgt. Savage and the Screaming Eagles" and "Extreme" and "Joe vs. Cobra" and "Valor vs. Venom" and "Sigma Six" and even "Street Fighter." Maybe it's best if folks just stop trying to shoehorn this film into being "RAH: The Movie" and realize that it's "G.I. Joe: The Movie." It's not RAH, it's a new take based on very similar characters and elements, but ultimately something different. Something more like G.I. Joe: Reloaded or (especially) Sigma Six or what have you. It's a "reboot" in every sense of the word, not a straight adaptation of "our" G.I. Joe. This isn't designed to get people that already give a hoot about Joe (a pretty small number compared to other fandoms) into theaters. It's designed to get a whole new generation of kids involved and engaged with the brand the same way the Star Wars prequels did for that series (say what you will about the quality of those films, the movies made insane amounts of money and the kids these days are still begging their parents for Star Wars toys).

 

Franchises change over time. We were never going to get 1982 RAH Joe on the screen. Maybe the movie will be crap, maybe it won't, but calling it crap just because it's different is fairly lazy criticism. American or not (Though it's worth noting that the team is led by two Americans, and likely has more American members than any other nationality, making it a clearly American-dominated organization), G.I. Joe can still be a "real hero" and entertaining to watch without it.

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